Paddington: the toddler

06/10/16

So apparently when your baby reaches the 14 months milestone, parents finally get over the shock of having a baby and perhaps, parenting might seem a little easier (mainly through practice and familiarity I suspect!), according to a recent Little Tikes parenting survey. Pads is less than 2 weeks shy of being a strong willed 15 month old so do I feel less shocked now? Yes, I suppose I do, and really I should by now right?!

For me the shock was definitely real in those first few days/weeks/months, but probably somewhere around the 8-10month mark, I felt like I was finally doing a good job and could call myself a proper parent (I think surviving the first 6 months is the main hurdle – if you can all do that relatively unscathed then you are going to be fine). My world no longer feels turned upside down and shaken out. My world feels good and rich and full of love for my little one, and for that I am eternally grateful.

We have our little routines, they aren’t set in stone but they are ours and they are working, and as I have said before this is the most rewarding job I have ever, and will ever have (not to mention of course it is the hardest too) and I can barely remember a time pre Pads. Life certainly wasn’t as cool and fun and rewarding and fulfilling before my little man came along, that’s for sure.

It’s been another chokka few weeks where life has been beyond busy and Pads has just blossomed and grown into a proper little boy almost overnight it seems. I have been saying for a while that he is no longer a baby, but I really mean it this time. He is a toddler – officially. And boy can he toddle!

Here’s a little more about my boy and his achievements and experiences this month:

Hair today…

So after asserting that I wasn’t going to cut his hair ever. I have cut his hair. Not a lot, but a little bit of his baby hair is gone (from his head anyway, I couldn’t bear to throw it away so kept most of it and gave some to grateful grandparents as a little keep sake).

It felt like a huge but necessary moment. His fringe was getting in his eyes and sweeping it to one side just wasn’t cutting it anymore, especially not when the wind blew it back into his eyes again, plus he was starting to look a little red neck/girly at the back where the hair was growing super long and straggly. I just trimmed the ends and the front so he could see and suddenly, he looks more like a little guy than ever before.

Cutting it was a challenge in itself as of course he doesn’t do sitting carefully still, but I managed the briefest and bluntest of snips while he was in the bath distracted with his boat toys. At first it looked a bit wonky in the fringe front but it has luckily grown into a pretty cool style since – how you properly cut a toddlers hair I do not know, but I managed to only cut hair so that was a success I think!

He can now see, whichever way the wind blows, and no one could mistake him for a girl anymore, and I have a couple of locks of his beautifully soft blonde hair to cherish forever.

Clever hands

Pads is dexterous and very tactile at the moment. Everything has to be felt or squeezed or scratched, as well as of course put into his mouth and chewed. This requires extra vigilant parenting, which I failed on yesterday by letting him hold a bar of cinnamon soap that looked a lot like fudge…clearly it didn’t taste that way for as soon as he had bitten into it, the tears and crying commenced, and I don’t blame him. I bloody hate cinnamon and am pretty sure I wouldn’t be a fan of eating soap either.

He has been enjoying stacking his plastic cups and bricks for a while now, but he has recently started really stacking them with precision and care and balancing things on top of other things in a quest to understand what works, and inevitably, what doesn’t. The first sign of this new precision handling was when he stacked a wooden block on top of another shaped block and then took one of his beloved Paddington bear toy’s wellingtons and placed that really cautiously on top. He looked ever so pleased with himself when his newly made toy tower stayed standing and celebrated by gleefully knocking it over and trying again, only this time he tried to stack 2 wellies on top of each other at a rather jaunty angle which didn’t work quite as well.

He is really picking up on things fast though and learns quickly. He is now an adept tower builder using all sorts of shapes and sizes of materials, but nothing gives him as much as pleasure as destroying his construction efforts as soon as he has built them!

Another way in which his careful handling of goods has demonstrated itself, is that he will now properly go and fetch something that I ask for, if he understands what I mean of course – which more often than not he does, or he will purposefully hand me something that he wants me or Jon to play with or demonstrate for him, such as his blowing bubbles or Scuba Steve the wind-up bath time penguin.

He can also spot small, detailed objects from seemingly quite far away, such as tiny stones or gravel when we are outside or specks of dust or crumbs in the house.

He has long, deft fingers too, akin to a piano player or master carpenter so I have high hopes for his creative and manual abilities already.

Sweep

Pads latest favourite play thing is not a toy. It is a sweeping brush with soft bristles and a wooden handle. Clearly he has been watching me sweep the impractical stone flooring we have in the kitchen every day after he has thrown various bits of his meals across the room, and he is fascinated by the brush and it’s sweeping abilities. So much so, that it was getting a bit dangerous letting him handle the big adult broom as he would wield it about quite aggressively, so when we were visiting a rather upmarket and fancy homeware store in Ross recently, he spotted a kid size broom that he made an instant bee line for and of course, I bought it for him and it’s now his most prized possession. He sweeps most mornings and every evening at least. We haven’t quite got to the actual teaching him to sweep up dust and dirt and then get a dustpan and brush to sweep it into the bin, but it’s a great start!

Nit picking

Not my favourite part of being a parent this one, Pads brought some little friends home with him the other week, possibly from nursery, who knows?

I was stroking his hair in the bath just before washing it as I usually do, when I spotted a piece of innocent dirt – or so I thought. When I pulled the speck out of his hair and placed it on the side of the bath for closer inspection, it became grossly apparent that the moving part-brown, part-translucent thing now facing me, was a living creature and it wasn’t a fly or something that had just gotten stuck on a hair. I recognised it from my childhood days spent having my long thick mane doused in disgustingly strong smelling chemicals and having to sit outside for a few hours whilst it got to work and then my poor mum having to come out and comb every single strand of my bountiful barnet until all the dead little critters and their eggs were gone. Yup, this was a head louse, and there is never just the one.

Then began the further forensic inspection of Pads head which revealed a few more of these nasty adult buggers and lots of their little black nits – the eggs. My poor boy had his first nit infestation and it made me very very itchy to be combing through his locks.

I looked into the best ways to remove nits from a 14 month old and rather than try a chemical based solution, or a pongy shampoo, I opted for the old fashioned nit comb and conditioner wet combing method. I spent every evening for a week lovingly and literally nit picking the blood suckers from my son’s gorgeous head and hair, and it became a bit of an obsession to be honest. It part grossed me out that I was handling their horrible little bodies and part satisfied the heck out of me that I was foiling their dastardly plans to feast on my baby and helping my little boy become nit free and comfortable once again.

I am pretty sure I managed to get them all through grit and determination and am keeping a close eye on his head every other night now for nit maintenance. Needless to say, I also got them and wasn’t quite as old fashioned in my approach to sorting my own head out as it was just itchy and gross, so I slapped a load of supposedly natural head lice shampoo on my still very long and thick barnet, and got Jon to reticently nit comb it one romantic evening. The shampoo seems to have done the trick as I am no longer clawing at my own scalp but I have another treatment still to go to be extra sure.

Nits really are the pits, and they don’t just appear in dirty hair as is often mis-thought. They actually love a nice clean head of hair and in particular favour the blessed of barnet, so for that Pads I am very sorry. You take after me in the masses of thick hair department and this is why, this won’t be the last batch of nits you (and I) get. Sorry.

The Lakes learning to walk like a pro weekend

We joined a group of my gorgeous tv friends on a long weekend holiday to a beautiful country house in the Lake District a couple of weeks back. It was a bit different to when we last did the same holiday (unbelievably 3 years ago – where the heck does time go?!) when none of us had kids, but do you know what, this time it was better because of the kids. Pads was on top form, along with his younger baby buddy Emily, who delighted in stealing Pads hats on our lakeside walk!

Over the course of the weekend, his walking went from a few doddery steps here and there to full on treks around the ample grounds and up and down the grand stair case. The house was big and spacious with lots of steps and changes in flooring texture from stone to carpet and rugs and wood and tiles and Pads was just in his element, putting himself through his paces.

To see his confidence and ability grow hand in hand (or should that be foot over foot?!) in just a few days was astounding, not to mention utterly adorable.

His little face was the picture of pride when he had walked from one side of the house to the other along the long landing, or did a circuit around the house outside in the fresh air holding on tightly to my hand for reassurance and guidance. He was particularly interested in walking down the gravel drive that then turned into earth and grass, really concentrating on every step and feeling the ground beneath his feet.

Honestly, buying him his first shoes was the best thing we could have done as he loves them so much and points to them when he sees them, wanting them to be put on immediately. They have given him his wings so to speak and he is so proud of them. He also loves his slipper sock muk-luks- it’s all about comfortable cosy footwear for my boy!

One morning while everyone was nursing hangovers and having lie ins, I took Pads for a proper walk along the country lane and to a little bridge over a river, gently going at his pace and stopping to point at the sheep in the fields around us and touch a blade of grass. It was lovely to slow down and see the world from his perspective, one amazing sight after another.

He walked the whole way holding my hand and chattered merrily with such a look of contentment and pride that he could do what all the grown ups do and just go for a walk. I was so incredibly proud of him. We sat on the bridge watching the water flow beneath us for quite a while, Pads fascinated by what was happening right below him and me holding onto him tightly and enjoying the peace and fantastic fells scenery surrounding us – as well as doing a few cursory nit checks in his hair whilst we were still!

From that weekend on, he just wants to walk everywhere and keep practicing to make it perfect. The first day we walked into nursery together he couldn’t have looked more chuffed and the nursery ladies fell about themselves with his cuteness and charming little waddle walk. He is such a brilliant confident little walker now and the adventure has only just begun as now he can walk, of course he wants to be able to run and climb on his sturdy little feet next.

Toddler proofing

Having a toddler is so different to having a baby isn’t it? Suddenly, Pads is able to do so much more than ever before and he is super inquisitive, surprisingly quick and into absolutely everything, often before I have fully clocked what he is about to do.

This really showed itself the other morning when we were doing what we have always done, both of us in the bathroom getting ready for work/nursery. I was on the loo, and suddenly he sped across the landing and decided he would try to walk down the stairs by himself – he has never tried this alone before and has always been really good at crawling down backwards or waiting for us and reaching out for our hands to help him walk down. Before I could get to him from my rather compromising position, the inevitable happened and in excruciating slow motion.

He fell down the stairs, first on his bum then over onto his side, landing startled on his back on the mid landing. I went white and felt sick as I raced down after him as quick as I could to scoop him up all red faced, hysterically crying and his little body rigid with the shock.

Luckily, he actually didn’t hurt himself but he was very upset and shocked by the incident. And I just felt awful and cursed the fact I had to have gone to the loo. The poor guy needed a lot of extra cuddles and boob and then he was right as rain thankfully.

We have since installed another stair gate at the top of the stairs so that can’t happen again, as I think we were very lucky this time and I don’t want a repeat for my intrepid little explorer.

Independence days

Pads is incredibly independent in some things at the moment, from wanting to feed himself, to walk on his own, brush his own teeth and play by himself in his own way, but he is also incredibly baby like again in other respects.

He is breast feeding much more again, needing to suckle and have comfort boob like he did a few months back and he is often found with his hand on or down my top just making sure everything is there if he wants it! He is also very much a mummy’s boy at the moment too, needing lots of super snugly cuddles and climbing on me when we are near each other just to ensure he can and then going off to do his own thing, but always coming back for some grounding mum time when he needs it.

The down side of this is because he wants me all the time, he has actually turned away from Jon and burst into tears when he has tried to take him for a hug, wanting to just be with me. Jon is trying not to take it personally but I know he is finding it hard. I have heard this is just a phase that a lot of babies go through when they are finding their own independence and way in the world. They need their mum to reassure them and return to when they aren’t sure or feel overwhelmed by a new thing they have learnt or are trying to do, and only mum will do. It isn’t permanent I don’t think, and I wouldn’t really mind if it was!, and there will come a time when he probably prefers hanging out with his cooler, sportier, and more active dad anyway, so for now, it’s just what he needs, and I am happy to be his number one.(Sorry Jon!)

Food glorious food

A big part of my boy’s evolving sense of independence and really wanting to do certain things himself, is when it comes to mealtimes. He has to have a spoon and he has to feed himself, otherwise food will be thrown about in frustration. Food also gets thrown about in excitement and trial and error anyway, but he is very particular about feeding himself and looks so pleased and proud when he manages the actually quite complex sequence of actions of putting the spoon into the bowl, scooping food on to it, lifting it to his mouth without spilling it and then putting it into his mouth and taking the food off.

He does a really splendid job. He always gets something on the spoon and if it’s yoghurt he goes for a mighty big dolloped spoonful each time. A lot of it does end up on his bib or nose or chin or all three, and is then usually smeared across his face, but he has picked this skill up really quickly and just wants to hone it, which I totally get. Eating is probably the single most important skill to have for survival, next to drinking of course, but he already has that skill down!

Speaking of food, last month I put on a Farmyard at the Abergavenny Food Festival, which was a real labour of love and a dream come true to be a part of such an incredible event that I have loved and visited for years. I am proud as anything with how it all went and loved working with such a motivated and inspirational group of like-minded people and am gutted that it is now over.  It really gave me back my working mojo and made me realise something I knew deep down anyway but had perhaps lost a bit in the whole maternity leave/return to work scenario: I belong in a career in food. Its my thing, my passion and its what I am good at.  I feel like the festival awakened me and made me rediscover myself which is all kinds of brilliant, so thank you for that! I have my workplace confidence and full on passion and drive back. I can be a mum and do satisfying, fulfilling and demanding work, I know this because I just proved it. Watch this space!

We got to enjoy the food festival as a family on the Sunday as my Farmyard was a one day special, and Pads was a little star, saying hi to passers-by, crawling and waddling around the castle grounds, especially interested by what everyone was eating! He tried fabulous garlicky focaccia from Alex Gooch – win!; a crumbly Caerphilly and strong cheddar from Godminster; some crispy calamari and a couple of cheeky frites from Dylan’s fish shack and a special treat of a few licks of Shepherds sheep’s milk ice cream, tayberry and mint choc chip flavours, which he loved eating almost as much as he loved getting all over his face and in his hair! The boy loves food, now I wonder where he gets that from hey?!

Sticking to the theme of food again, we recently discovered a new way to do our weekly shop, and from that, I also found my latest passion project. I have been inspired to join the Food Assembly movement and become a host in my village, basically connecting local producers with local people who want to buy their food and making good, affordable, sustainable and local food accessible and easy to buy. If you haven’t heard of this social enterprise yet, check it out and see if there is one near you to join, it’s the future of a more sustainable food system, and it’s free to join with no obligation or commitment to buy at all.

The model is simple: a collection of great local food producers and farmers make their products available to buy on an online catalogue co-ordinated by a host (that’s me!), the buyer logs in and chooses what groceries they want and pays for them online, then once a week at the same time and the same place, the buyer comes to collect their goods directly from the people who make and produce them, thus building a greater sense of community and fostering a local and hyper network, as well as enabling people to access the food local to them in a convenient and modern way. The host puts all of this together and runs the weekly collection event as well as occasional special events in conjunction, from food talks and tastings to demos and farm visits for example. The Assembly ensures the producers get a fair price as they set their costs and minimum order levels and receive over 80% of the sales of their produce (as compared to between 15-25% on average with the supermarkets), and customers get to learn about where their food comes from and support the local economy just by changing how and where they do their weekly shop. It’s brilliant.

It’s huge in France and across Europe with 700 Food Assemblies in total, and has been slowly but surely simmering away over here with 40 groups now in place and more – like mine – in development.

Pads and I have been going to the Abergavenny Food Assembly for the last fortnight and he has enjoyed playing with the knobbly pears in our fruit box, smelling the natural soaps (and unfortunately trying to eat them!), lapping up some deliciously creamy raw milk, sipping some just pressed apple juice and having a tiny taste of some fine fennel charcuterie and juicy baked gammon. Legend.

All this whilst he has been feeling a bit under the weather this week too, he has such an awful chesty cough and runny nose bless him (another nursery treat I believe!) but I am hoping the benefits of all of this nutritious fresh food and extra drops of my incredibly local (!) and nutritious milk will nip his cold in the bud before it goes full blown and we all go down with it.

We have now switched our regular supermarket shop, to buying local food from our local Food Assembly for all the fresh staples such as meat, fish, veg, fruit, dairy and herbs, and the quality and taste have been fantastic. The cost has been comparable, and even slightly cheaper on some products too.

I have been so impressed and inspired by the simplicity, importance and brilliance of the idea that I applied to set up my own Food Assembly in my beloved village and have been accepted! So watch this space for a launch sometime around the New Year!

Spreading the love

With the all new walking Paddington, comes a whole new level of cuteness and confidence that is all part of my little guy’s endless charm. The ladies at his nursery have fallen for him hook, line and sinker and the nursery leader Zoe told me that he is just impossible not to love and that she adores him, which was so beautiful to hear. She said they all think he is gorgeous and charming and so loveable, and she informed me that he has started walking up to her and tapping her on the arm or back, and then chattering away at her, waiting for her to speak back, giving another brilliant jibber jabber monologue and then toddling off happily, content that he has been listened to and under the impression that he has been understood! That’s my guy. Super cute.

He also has a little bestie, Elin, who we used to go to Baby Acorns group with back when they were both just a few weeks old. My how they have both now grown and changed! Apparently they love to follow each other about the room and play with the same toys and have little toddler chats together throughout the day. Now that is making my ovaries dance a bit I must say.

That’s my boy, a loveable and very loved little dude.